Welcome back to another blog of wedge football. It’s me, Troop Crossland, your host and I’ll be taking you on a ride through the reviews of your teams through the best and worst teams. It’s been a hell of a four weeks you guys and it’s my pleasure and greatest honor that you have chosen me as your host. With that being said let’s dive through the rankings shall we?
Championship contenders
1. Victorious Secret (4-0)
This goes without saying but Owner Joseph is the last remaining team that is undefeated and with that being said she has earned the right to be #1. Ezekiel Elliot seems to have gotten his shit in a pile and has scored 20+ points these past two weeks which is a surprise to me for sure. It seems as if the Dak – Zeke combo is back and deadly as ever. Even more so, Antonio Gibson is her RB2 and she even has James Robinson sitting on her bench which is crazy given his talent. DJ Moore led Victorious Secret in battle and scored an amazing 31.9 points against Dallas. It is my belief that this team is fradulent as fuck though but for now JJ gets to rub her fucking 4-0 record right in our fat dumb fucking faces.
2. The Fire to Consume All (3-1)
What can I say, this team proves excellence by defeating one of the top teams in the league, the jibroni himself: “Mr_clean & company.” Tyreek hill dropped a fucking massive 47.6 points which is absolutely filthy and unbelievable to be honest. Proving his value as the #1 WR in the entire fucking league. Supplemented by Tyler Boyd’s 20.8 points and Ryan Tannehills 18.82 points this team pulled only a measly 125.72 points and has lost to one of the worst teams in the league during week 3. That being said even a blind squirrel can find a nut sometimes and this team is looking to rebuild for week 5 against another deadly foe: Super Saiyan Bomb Squad.
Playoff Contenders
3. Super Saiyan Bomb Squad (2-2)
Owner Collin was the weekly winner in week four. This teamed was plagued with an injury of its most valuable player but is still able to pull quite impressive numbers. It is noteworthy to noticed that Buffalos defense pulled 21 points and was this teams 3rd highest scoring player but still clutched ab expected dub from Lambeau Leapers. Now this team doesn’t exactly have the best record but it’s points for is significantly high and once CMC comes back it’s gonna be a knockout team. This team has a big week 5 against him for he plays the formidable “fire to consume all.” Only time will tell if he can clutch one out next week but look to see this team off in the playoffs.
4. Chester the Molester (3-1)
Chester the molester took his first loss this week and unfortunately dropped down from the pinnacle of this league. However this team had over four players score above 20 points. Jonathan Taylor broke out of his shell for the first time this season and he will be an absolute beast once the best offensive lineman in the entire fucking league comes back onto the colts from his injury (Quentin Nelson). Chris Patterson did a massive 34.6 points but it was in vain for it could not stop Owner Evans from burrowing his chubb in owner JT’s team. This team looks to rebuild in the upcoming weeks.
5. Mr_clean & company (2-2)
Well, well, well, Owner Laughlin has caused much stress to owner Crossland and has been the biggest competitor this team has faced but has failed to overcome the challenger before him. Once owner Crosslands greatest friend it was a heartbreaking battle. The fire to consume all had a low scoring game this week but it was quite advantageous to this competitor that Mr_clean & company scored its lowest score yet during week 4. That being said Owner Laughlin has gotten over his deadly week 4 and looks to rebuild his teams record during a less dangerous week 5 and 6.
6. Burrow my Chubb (2-2)
Scary Terry, Saquon Barkley, David Montgomery. These three players lead this team to an unexpected dominating victory against the undefeated Chester the Molester. Like holy shit no one would’ve suspected this. Saquon Barkley which seemed to be a previously non factor in fantasy seems to be a deadly option for the upcoming weeks. David Montgomery seemed to have injured his knee and could miss some time in the next few weeks which will definitely hurt this team but Tom Brady and Davante Adams will have to carry the weight with Saquon and scary terry for the upcoming games.
Dogshit
7. Polish your Section (2-2)
Time to give credit where credit is due. This team seems to be dragging themselves out of the whole they put themselves in and we asked their way out from a two loss streak to make a positive record for themselves. However their wins were against two low scoring teams it is a feat worth acknowledging. Even more so it’s as if God wants this team to succeed after Owner Jamie wins his game by 3 fucking points after Mike Williams failed to score more than 5 points on Monday night football after averaging about 30 points a game. Josh Allen and Kareem hunt took this team for a ride to victory right in Chef Willies face.
8. Nicks Brilliant team (1-3)
This is where I have to start roasting people. Owner Nick had some poppage from Dak, Jefferson and a massive pop from Deebo Samuel, but it’s like the rest of his team is nonexistent. However out of all the dogshit teams this one seems to be one that can rebound the most. Best of luck to you Owner Nick.
9. Lambeau Leapers (1-3)
Owner Annalysse has had a tough few matchups. Unfortunately, her team isn’t putting up the numbers required to win most of her games. This is surprising given the talent she has drafted but the numbers speak for themselves on this one. Owner Annalysse put up her second highest score this week for a measly 110.92 points. If this team was drafted last year it would be a definite contender for the entire fucking championship however the chemistry just isn’t there shown in recent games. There is still hope for this team to rebound.
10. Six toed freaks (1-3)
Actually unbelievable. This team pulled an unbelievable upset against I wish to taste defeat and brought the team humility after giving them their first fat fucking loss by fucking .52 points. The shame that was felt from this team winning is one that will never be forgotten in the entire history of Wedge. However, this team scored one of the lowest points record to date in this league in week 4 for an 83.42 points. I’m not sure if this team will go anywhere given it’s current projection.
11. Willies World-Class Team (1-3)
As previously stated in the power rankings Willie came 3 points shy of a victory to Polish your Section when Mike Williams failed to produce 5 fucking points. This team has been plagued by disaster and misfortune and bad picks this league. Current projection not looking great, hopefully can salvage some pieces off the waivers and rebuild this team to be more formidable.
12. Scott’s Tots (1-3)
Owner Sean was able to pull of the first win for this team against a six toed freaks team which pulled out a horrendous 83.42 points. Not saying he doesn’t deserve a win but it’s pretty hard to lose to 83.42 points. I’m not sure what happened when you and Willies World-class team drafted but I’m pretty sure y’all must’ve had cats on your keyboards clicking random buttons while making your picks. However it’s still early for this league and anything can happen when an $800 cash prize is on the line. Best of luck to you.
Fin.
Waters Edge Football League 